So, I just want to put this on paper. I love thinking about it...and I just want to share it. :)
Anyway...I have started well actually let's say developed a beautiful friendship with an amazing person. He is light hearted, charming, funny, spontaneous, unpredictable, handsome as all get out, and an accent that makes me weak in the knees. I would tag this as "starting something" but we live over 10 hours away from each other and both know pretty much know, ya know. It feels great to have something to chat with every once in awhile that isn't right in the thick of things and I'm not gonna lie, I get a bit giddy when he calls. When I get nervous I either hardly talk...or talk WAY too much because I'm either afraid of rejection or trying to impress someone, respectively. All I'm gonna say, is that I talk way too much when he gets me on the phone. haha.
When we each first left Denver for the summer, I sent him a care package. I wasn't going to tell him about it and try to get his address secretly, but I'm awful at keeping secrets of that nature. I get super excited about stuff and just want to share it with people before they get it so that person will be just as excited! So..I'm not great at surprises. hahah. As one of my old Dean's said, I wear my emotions on my sleeve - I can't help it!!!
Anyway, so I was talking to him on the phone the other night and he oh so casually mentioned that he needed to put my present in the mail. I go, PRESENT! I get a PRESENT!! I am sooooooo excited! I tried to get him to tell me what it is, but he's not as forthcoming as I am! He said he was out n about and spotted it and knew I'd like it...and I might have a couple other presents too - he's not sure yet ;)
So, I'll just have to sit and patiently wait until it comes in the mail. :) OH I'M SO EXCITED!!!
Okay, that's all for now...I am driving my grandma to the city (1 1/2hrs) tomorrow starting at 6am, so I need some SHUT EYE!!
Peace, Love, and Patience...
Monday, July 28, 2008
Saturday, July 26, 2008
My Current Journey
My brother is getting married on Sept. 27 and my cousin is getting married the weekend before on the 20th. I have a goal of losing about 40 lbs before my cousin's wedding and definitely before my brother's wedding so I look pretty in a bridesmaid dress. You are welcome to join me on my journey by observing my progress over to the left. I've already lost 6 pounds..so I'm well on my way!! Enjoy~
Peace, Love, and Patience...
Peace, Love, and Patience...
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Wolves in Sheep's Clothing
I've only been home for...4 hours..and not even home home, just to Amarillo which is 1 1/2hrs from actual home, but it already feels so GREAT! I felt so much pressure on my shoulders and in the back of my mind I knew all the things I needed to accomplish at home that my wasted time in Denver was not helping accomplish!
I also figured something out while I was in Denver...towards the end of my trip - i figured out what I love coming home so much. It is because I can truly be ME. Every weird, stupid, dorky, silly, ridiculous, shabby part of me can be me. I can be myself so much more at home than anywhere else. I may be one of the few 22yr olds, I've come to realize, that actually prefers loose regular ole' t-shirts as opposed to tight fitting cutesy t-shirts. Sure..this probably doesn't help with attracting the opposite sex, but I'm 22yrs old! I've got my whole life ahead of me and when the right guy comes along...he's not going to care that I wear t-shirts that are too big the majority of the time. During school and such of course I dress nicer for class, but during summer..I just want to wear my comfortable t-shirt! What is so freaking wrong with that!?!??!? PS...I DON'T CARE IF WE ARE GOING TO A PARTY OR A BAR...I'M STILL WEARING MY COMFY TEE!!!!!!!!!!!!
I feel like I am always being nagged by my friends because I'm not wearing my make-up heavy enough (when in fact I DO wear makeup, which is getting less and less frequent everyday) or my shirt isn't tight enough or cute enough or low enough. Oh, I'm sorry that I HAVE RESPECT for myself and my body and I do NOT feel the need to exploit myself in order to attract some disgusting tramp of a man. No thank you! The only reason any of my tighter shirts are as tight as they are is because I've gained weight since I bought them and I'm too lazy and loathe shopping too much to buy new ones! Not because I think it's "sexy" or cute or whatever you want to call it...Ewe. I don't wear the right shoes, my hair is done wrong, I put black with brown.
I DO NOT CARE ! ! !
How many times do I have to say that before it gets through to anyone?!?!??
How is a girl supposed to love herself when the people closest to her are tearing her down at every turn? It is a messed up world we live in and we should be building each other up rather than slowly and discretely making digs at one another and tearing apart the fragile self we currently have.
Perhaps I should also be in search of new friends who love me for me and not for who they wish I was...wouldn't that be an interesting social experiment...friends that love every thing that's wrong with you just the way it is, like a soul mate - but several of them and as friends. Hmm...someone should try that! :)
Just a little rant there....had to get it out!
I also figured something out while I was in Denver...towards the end of my trip - i figured out what I love coming home so much. It is because I can truly be ME. Every weird, stupid, dorky, silly, ridiculous, shabby part of me can be me. I can be myself so much more at home than anywhere else. I may be one of the few 22yr olds, I've come to realize, that actually prefers loose regular ole' t-shirts as opposed to tight fitting cutesy t-shirts. Sure..this probably doesn't help with attracting the opposite sex, but I'm 22yrs old! I've got my whole life ahead of me and when the right guy comes along...he's not going to care that I wear t-shirts that are too big the majority of the time. During school and such of course I dress nicer for class, but during summer..I just want to wear my comfortable t-shirt! What is so freaking wrong with that!?!??!? PS...I DON'T CARE IF WE ARE GOING TO A PARTY OR A BAR...I'M STILL WEARING MY COMFY TEE!!!!!!!!!!!!
I feel like I am always being nagged by my friends because I'm not wearing my make-up heavy enough (when in fact I DO wear makeup, which is getting less and less frequent everyday) or my shirt isn't tight enough or cute enough or low enough. Oh, I'm sorry that I HAVE RESPECT for myself and my body and I do NOT feel the need to exploit myself in order to attract some disgusting tramp of a man. No thank you! The only reason any of my tighter shirts are as tight as they are is because I've gained weight since I bought them and I'm too lazy and loathe shopping too much to buy new ones! Not because I think it's "sexy" or cute or whatever you want to call it...Ewe. I don't wear the right shoes, my hair is done wrong, I put black with brown.
I DO NOT CARE ! ! !
How many times do I have to say that before it gets through to anyone?!?!??
How is a girl supposed to love herself when the people closest to her are tearing her down at every turn? It is a messed up world we live in and we should be building each other up rather than slowly and discretely making digs at one another and tearing apart the fragile self we currently have.
Perhaps I should also be in search of new friends who love me for me and not for who they wish I was...wouldn't that be an interesting social experiment...friends that love every thing that's wrong with you just the way it is, like a soul mate - but several of them and as friends. Hmm...someone should try that! :)
Just a little rant there....had to get it out!
Sunday, July 20, 2008
A Reflection on Ethiopia
I wrote this reflection shortly after I returned from my service trip in Ethiopia. Enjoy...
My Secret Love Affair
Before I left for my unforgettable adventure, several people asked me if I was still planning to go on the trip or if I would pass up this once in a lifetime opportunity. Briefly, I would look at them completely bewildered with the thought of, are you unstable? Then, I would realize I was standing on crutches and thus their reason for the question. On the contrary to popular belief, no part of me felt the need to stay home. I could heal in Ethiopia just as well as I could in America. I was getting on that plane, with or without a cast.
Once we reached the compound and the school supported by the efforts of Four Quarters for Kids, we met the most amazing and gorgeous souls. The children crave knowledge so much that some of them walk 1½ to 2 hours every morning to have breakfast at 7:00am and start school at 8:00am. School ends each day at 3:00pm and then sports begin. Some of the children stay as late as 5:00pm either practicing with their team or in the library studying. Then, they begin their 1½ to 2 hour journey. On their way home many are required to fill jugs of water and gather sticks to make a fire. The next morning, they begin again.
Amharic is the official language of Ethiopia and one of the most beautiful and magnificent spoken tongues I have been blessed to encounter. Everyone at Project Mercy speaks Amharic. I was asked to teach English. Teaching is difficult enough in itself even with children who want to learn. Now, teaching English to first and second graders, who speak a language I do not, was near impossible. It was the most amazing and uplifting experience. It was moving to see them cram four or five into one desk with elbows, shoulders, and arms overlapping because they wanted to learn. I would do my best to show examples of the words and would dägämä (repeat) everything many times. It was thrilling when the children would run up to me during recess everyday and shout a phrase or word I had just taught, "NEAR! THE GIRL IS NEAR THE DOOR!"
Children in every corner of the globe are precious. In Ethiopia, though, they are different. The children of Ethiopia are not only precious, but also strong, independent, hard-working, smart, self-sufficient, beautiful, and above all else, unashamed to love fully. The young boys and girls have so much love for everything and everyone around them it is hard to ignore. Walking down the road, we often saw two boys holding hands or with their arms around each other. In this part of the world, that is a taboo or at least comes with certain lifestyle connotations, in Ethiopia it is a sign of friendship and complete adoration. It is extremely endearing. I could constantly feel the love beaming off every individual we encountered.
At Project Mercy love fills every crack and cranny of the compound. It would serve everyone well to visit Project Mercy in Yetebon, Ethiopia and experience unsurpassed and unbridled love. Absorbing love from a child, peers, and elders is easy, allowing one's self to pour out love for children, peers, and elders is something many shy away from but all should embrace with open hearts. After all, what is the point of having all that love inside, if it is not shared?
People often leave an impoverished place such as Ethiopia with the feelings of shame or guilt for how extravagant their life is, but they should not. The only reason to feel shameful of your life is if you do not enjoy every single minute. The people of Ethiopia taught me one very important lesson among many. I hope you will take this with you and remember it each morning. No matter how much you have or do not have, always remember to be thankful for it, cherish every moment, and love your life and those in it as intensely as possible.
The dictionary defines love as a love affair; an intensely amorous incident; amour.
One night before going into the dinner hall I was stopped by a soft whisper of my name. I turned around and there in front of me stood a little girl who sat in the front row of my English class struggling to see the blackboard. Everyday she wore the same blue striped shirt and bright pink sweatpants with a McDonald's logo. Her innocent face and big, brown, beautiful eyes looked up at me with the most love a human being could have for another human being and said, very gently, "I love you."
Yes, I did have the most intense amorous incident, with Ethiopia. Shhh...don't tell America.
My Secret Love Affair
Before I left for my unforgettable adventure, several people asked me if I was still planning to go on the trip or if I would pass up this once in a lifetime opportunity. Briefly, I would look at them completely bewildered with the thought of, are you unstable? Then, I would realize I was standing on crutches and thus their reason for the question. On the contrary to popular belief, no part of me felt the need to stay home. I could heal in Ethiopia just as well as I could in America. I was getting on that plane, with or without a cast.
Once we reached the compound and the school supported by the efforts of Four Quarters for Kids, we met the most amazing and gorgeous souls. The children crave knowledge so much that some of them walk 1½ to 2 hours every morning to have breakfast at 7:00am and start school at 8:00am. School ends each day at 3:00pm and then sports begin. Some of the children stay as late as 5:00pm either practicing with their team or in the library studying. Then, they begin their 1½ to 2 hour journey. On their way home many are required to fill jugs of water and gather sticks to make a fire. The next morning, they begin again.
Amharic is the official language of Ethiopia and one of the most beautiful and magnificent spoken tongues I have been blessed to encounter. Everyone at Project Mercy speaks Amharic. I was asked to teach English. Teaching is difficult enough in itself even with children who want to learn. Now, teaching English to first and second graders, who speak a language I do not, was near impossible. It was the most amazing and uplifting experience. It was moving to see them cram four or five into one desk with elbows, shoulders, and arms overlapping because they wanted to learn. I would do my best to show examples of the words and would dägämä (repeat) everything many times. It was thrilling when the children would run up to me during recess everyday and shout a phrase or word I had just taught, "NEAR! THE GIRL IS NEAR THE DOOR!"
Children in every corner of the globe are precious. In Ethiopia, though, they are different. The children of Ethiopia are not only precious, but also strong, independent, hard-working, smart, self-sufficient, beautiful, and above all else, unashamed to love fully. The young boys and girls have so much love for everything and everyone around them it is hard to ignore. Walking down the road, we often saw two boys holding hands or with their arms around each other. In this part of the world, that is a taboo or at least comes with certain lifestyle connotations, in Ethiopia it is a sign of friendship and complete adoration. It is extremely endearing. I could constantly feel the love beaming off every individual we encountered.
At Project Mercy love fills every crack and cranny of the compound. It would serve everyone well to visit Project Mercy in Yetebon, Ethiopia and experience unsurpassed and unbridled love. Absorbing love from a child, peers, and elders is easy, allowing one's self to pour out love for children, peers, and elders is something many shy away from but all should embrace with open hearts. After all, what is the point of having all that love inside, if it is not shared?
People often leave an impoverished place such as Ethiopia with the feelings of shame or guilt for how extravagant their life is, but they should not. The only reason to feel shameful of your life is if you do not enjoy every single minute. The people of Ethiopia taught me one very important lesson among many. I hope you will take this with you and remember it each morning. No matter how much you have or do not have, always remember to be thankful for it, cherish every moment, and love your life and those in it as intensely as possible.
The dictionary defines love as a love affair; an intensely amorous incident; amour.
One night before going into the dinner hall I was stopped by a soft whisper of my name. I turned around and there in front of me stood a little girl who sat in the front row of my English class struggling to see the blackboard. Everyday she wore the same blue striped shirt and bright pink sweatpants with a McDonald's logo. Her innocent face and big, brown, beautiful eyes looked up at me with the most love a human being could have for another human being and said, very gently, "I love you."
Yes, I did have the most intense amorous incident, with Ethiopia. Shhh...don't tell America.
Life's To-Do List
I watched the Bucket List and A Walk To Remember the other day..both fabulous movies - cry movies for sure as well. Anyway...but what I took away from both of them is that the time to live life is right now. So many people go through life wishing they could do all these different things...and are jealous of people that actually do those things...instead of just doing them! So...I have started making a list of all the things I want to accomplish/experience before I die. I decided I will take an item or two each summer (unless it is more than a one time thing - learn Spanish for example) and save all year, then make plans and do it. So I will slowly work off my list. This summer I've already been white water rafting, that's one item...and my friend, Kyle, and I are planning to go skydiving later this summer...which is another item on the list. Live life with no regrets, that's my belief and I intend to practice what I preach to the fullest!!
Today, I went and got a manicure. It was wonderful! They massaged my hands and arms...then when my nails were drying they massaged my neck and shoulders. It was great! So..I think I may add getting a manicure once a month to my Life's To-Do List. It may not be the greatest to add since all my minimalism talk...but I think pampering yourself if one of life's greatest necessities.
Well, that's all for now...
Peace, Love, and Patience
Kristin
Today, I went and got a manicure. It was wonderful! They massaged my hands and arms...then when my nails were drying they massaged my neck and shoulders. It was great! So..I think I may add getting a manicure once a month to my Life's To-Do List. It may not be the greatest to add since all my minimalism talk...but I think pampering yourself if one of life's greatest necessities.
Well, that's all for now...
Peace, Love, and Patience
Kristin
Saturday, July 19, 2008
The Search
So...I saw this bumper sticker on facebook today that said life isn't about finding yourself it is about creating yourself. I'm going to go ahead and disagree with that one. I think that a person has to figure out what is most important to them and what they are passionate about...typically one does not just decide one day to create a new version of himself. And usually if they do...it either does not work out or they are doing it in a sense of losing 200 lbs and creating a more energetic self..which is different.
I also made the determination that I have not quite figured out where I fit in. I never have fit in anywhere my entire life...growing up I didn't fit in with the kids I went to school with or the girls I did gymnastics with, or the ones I did cheerleading with...and now I don't fit in with the people I go to school with nor do I fit in with those I socialize or the really the people I go to church with. I feel it is important to be different and not the same as the people around you..but I also think you should enjoy the same activities and have more than one thing in common.
I don't know...I guess I'm still searching for something, whether it be me, the perfect guy, or the perfect friend. Of course..I'm not sure if any of those exist to be found.
I also made the determination that I have not quite figured out where I fit in. I never have fit in anywhere my entire life...growing up I didn't fit in with the kids I went to school with or the girls I did gymnastics with, or the ones I did cheerleading with...and now I don't fit in with the people I go to school with nor do I fit in with those I socialize or the really the people I go to church with. I feel it is important to be different and not the same as the people around you..but I also think you should enjoy the same activities and have more than one thing in common.
I don't know...I guess I'm still searching for something, whether it be me, the perfect guy, or the perfect friend. Of course..I'm not sure if any of those exist to be found.
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
Internship
So, some news on the internship ordeal. I spoke with Rachel from HR of the Western Region and basically, I did not receive an answer. She said they work on a revolving system. Which means, a person applies, said persons application (if good enough) is placed into a file and when assistance is needed on a team and someone's experience and interests match up, the person is placed with said team. This means...who knows when that will happen!
Not great news, not fatal news...but not great news.
Not great news, not fatal news...but not great news.
Sunday, July 6, 2008
Fate
I was thinking on the way home today...and I started thinking about fate. It drives me crazy that I have NO idea what tomorrow holds. I have this intense fear that I am going to end up alone with my damn cat. I guess I still haven't truely discovered who I am yet. I feel like I'm going through a mid-life crisis at 22! WTF!
Anyway, so...yeah this fate thing..I don't know about it.
"Yeah, last year...someone's throat actually bled. Changed their life. It was great." -Wild Hogs
Anyway, so...yeah this fate thing..I don't know about it.
"Yeah, last year...someone's throat actually bled. Changed their life. It was great." -Wild Hogs
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